Am I too Independent?

OK So I’ve expanded my opportunities to meet new people and met a few nice guys but I really don’t think any of them are compatible. Even for a quarter of the things I do. It’s sad. What happened to motivated, goal oriented men??? And then I keep getting the same ones coming and going back and forth with their tail in between their legs but can’t even make a decision. Its such a pet peeve when a man is indecisive. Either you want to hang out or no. Otherwise don’t waste my time.

Here’s a perfect example. Music Man and I have talked a little bit this week and planned on getting together. So I had some free time and messaged him last night and again he was M.I.A. regardless if he got busy, he could at least respond to my text. I would have so much more respect for a guy that texts me “Sorry I’m busy can I text you tomorrow” then silence….

Lil country did the same thing. Talk talk talk and then poof? Where are you? Oh you want to text me for 3 hours but you can’t drive down here? Sorry, not sorry. You’re not the man for me.

In all honesty I want a combination of music man, my lil cub , MM and The Hunter and I would be the happiest woman around. Is that even possible? Some people laugh because I’m not the perfect ten and tell me I’m dreaming but when I invest in a man, I make him my King and he knows it. I’ve never had man complain that he’s not physically satisfied. Ever. I’m just too independent and guys want a woman to need them to breathe and I just can’t fake that. We can both exist without each other but when we come together I want to see Fireworks every single time we are together.

Maybe I Just need to visualize the perfect man for me and stop settling. And so the story begins…



Why do we go back to the “familiar”?


So now besides Music Man and I chatting again, another old friend has resurfaced. Funny thing about it is we never had sex or even kissed for that matter but we have fantasized about each other for over 6 years and hung out once. Crazy. We know all about each other too. Our families, lifestyle, business etc. etc. But he and I are both the dominant ones in a relationship. It’s hard for me to step down and hard for him to compromise. I don’t think we could ever work out. So why do we ( or I) go back to the familiar? Is it really easier? Or should I just leave the past in the past and move forward in get out of my comfort zone?

Did I mention how damn sexy these guys are???

Sunday Funday

So today’s Sunday and I wake to the beautiful sun shining on my face, the birds singing an and abundance of sexual energy and no outlet. Toys aren’t my thing. Was I wrong for closing the door on the idea of FWB (Friends with benefits)? I have a very big sexual appetite but I just can’t hop around from guy to guy, not what I’m looking for. Nor do I want to be with a guy that is seeing dozens of women. So what does an attractive, 40 something single woman do with all this energy?

Dance in the bedroom to latin music?


Work out for a bit?


Go to the pool and get a tan?


Have a nice glass of wine and read a book?


All of the above? Yes, please!

Lovably Lonely


The last few years I’ve made some major changes in my life but the biggest change came this past year or so when i removed people in my life that weren’t making me happy, helping me grow or helping me build my business. Facebook count? A moderate 700, friends in real life? Two. Wow! If I wasn’t such a positive person, I would be depressed.

Be careful what you ask for people. The truth is I feel like I’m just in this waiting period in my life. I’m building this wonderful business online by helping hundreds of people build their businesses through daily motivation & training And I absolutely love it! But I don’t have the quality friendships I’m looking for yet. It’s hard for me because I’m Ms. Social Butterfly but I’ve had to start my social group over after the divorce. So the truth is I’ve been searching but just haven’t found the group of people I care to associate with. I’ve tried female events girls out events, business co-ops, new restaurants, a few bars and even dating sites. All to no avail. Maybe It’s just a numbers game. I really don’t go out that much and if I do, I’m home by 9pm. Where on earth do I meet compatible people nowadays?

I would love to date but I’m not looking for just some quick hook up nor am I looking to get in a serious relationship. I would love to find a companion. This past weekend I contacted Music Man. He and I dated for 3 years openly and I truly loved hanging out with him but there was no romance or exchange of emotions. We’d go to dinner, watch movies and have amazing sex. And that would be perfect if I found guy #2 that I could go to business events and on fun adventures with. Probably another busy entrepreneur that had similar goals to me but was limited on time. Hence the reason for 2 companions.

I was out this weekend for a little while playing bags at a local place and met these two guys. I thought they both were in their mid 20’s but one was 29 and the other 35. We were having such a great time, chatted about what they do and all. And the bearded boy even kissed me twice because we won the game. But then he got a text from some random girl he dated previously so we all had this chat on what he should do. Of course after him telling us how drunk she got and how she was still dating her child’s father, I suggested that he just be honest with her. And tell her that he wasn’t interested. After all , he was the one that told us how turned off her was. Then like a typical Chicago Guy he did a 180 and told her to come up there and they hung out and had drinks. Guys, please don’t complain about a woman then go back to the same b.s. you say you can’t stand. It’s so unattractive. After that I left. I have no interest in being around someone that can’t make up his mind. And honestly, I’m not against anyone trying to meet their physical needs but why bother telling people how awful she was in the first place?

I am attracted to rather confident intelligent men for the most part. It’s not about his finances, it’s more about his perseverance, motivation and positive outlook on life. The biggest turn off is when you run into these divorced men than play the woe is me role. At this point in life, we’ve all had our hearts broken, cheaten on or been financially taken to the cleaners by someone we once loved. It’s time to move forward. Let all that drams go. It’s time to start living and enjoy life not acting like a heart broken teenager.   It’s almost as if these 40 year old men have reversed roles with us women. So it’s time for me to venture out and find someone a little younger who’s energetic, sexy and will appreciate getting spoiled. One nice thing about being a single woman over 40 is we know exactly what we want. And most of us don’t have time for games.